Gearing up for the big ol day!

Well in all honesty I have about 10 big ol days this year!

But the one im referring to is Michelle's first day at school! Im so excited! On April 14th Michelle will go to school for the very first time! I can't tell you how nervous I am....

It's not going to be me telling her no and pushing her to do it anymore... It's going to be someone else.... It's just weird that it's not me...

Im excited because she will get to go interact with kids of all sorts... No two children in her class will have the exact same condiotion... My guess is it makes for a busy classroom. Good thing though that she will not be that far from the house. She will be bussed to and from school so I can still take James to and from...

But still what am I going to do????

Here's a view into my chaois....

JR wasn't all that aware but since he was sleeping I let him cuddle next to his baby sissy!

She is getting to be such a big girl...

I am continuously finding these on my camera.... I wonder if the kids are trying to tell me something.. Maybe im just a big sleepy head!

He loves his little sister so much!

They are goofy little boys!

And the answer is...

No... She does not have Pyloric Stenosis, and no she does not have GERD, no she does not have Reflux of any sorts....

With that said... Why is she still throwing up some might ask... Possibly a viral infection in her intestines or stomach... That is all they can tell us... Im really hoping today is the last of it now that we have some sort of answer!

She did throw up this really nasty ball of mucous earlier.. I know TMI... But she has not thrown up since! And she tiped the scales at 5 pounds 1 ounce today! Im so excited!! WAy to go baby girl! Next week is her one month appointment so im excited to see what she is after that!

And were off...

To the doctors to hopfully get some sort of answer. I can tell you theses last 3 nights have been the worst in 2 years. Hospital stays are nothing compared to being on your own with and EXTREMELY crabby, puking baby. Who is constantly hungry when you know you just fed her 5 minutes ago.

If I were not so adamant about her getting breastmilk until she is a year you better believe I would have given up this weekend. BUt im not going to she is going to get it no matter what!

Wish us luck that we get an answer!

Another hurdle...

Some days just seem to fly by while othersjust drag on...

With this deployment halfway done days are going to run into each other no matter what... It's just what happens...

I noticed a change in Abigail.. Now at first I didn't think much of it. Until I reported it to her doctors and then we were told to take her straight to the ER.

To find that they strongly suspect that she has Pyloric Stenosis... I have heard of this condition many times... From mainly friends and from what I can find online and from the docs it mainly happens in first born males.. Now 1 Abigail is number 4 and she is not a male...

To find out that she may need surgery is heartbreaking... We have to go back to Children's hospital to run more tests and find out if for sure she has it... If she does than she will be having surgery soon. We have to truy and reverse the damage that has been done....

These are the days where I question alot of things and where I throw my hands up and ask "why!". I understand that everyone thinks im amazing and strong... Truth is im just human.. I make mistakes, I swear sometimes... I eat chocolate when I should be eating a salad...

I want so badly for the doctors to be wrong in hopes that she just has the flu... Because I don't want to think about another doctor and another OR and post op appointments and lab dreaws.. And being away from her for any amount of time...

Just shoot me please...

Im tired.. No I take that back I am E-X-H-A-U-S-T-E-D!

From 10PM last night until 3AM this morning I was in the ER with Abigail... Only to find that she has bacterial conjunctivitis... An infection in her eyes! Are you kidding me??? How in the WORLD DID SHE GET THAT!!!!!

I don't touch, kiss, or even stroke her face.. No one else does either... All that's left for me to even think is she has clogged tear ducts and they are infected.. Too bad the medication they prescribed her not one pharmacy in Oceanside,CA fills it and it will take over a week to get it in.. So tomorrow we are going to the Pediatrician to see if she even needs it.

Good thing they are open on the weekends. I did get the eye drops that she needs though. That was easy. I called 9 pharmacies, and went to 6 of them and some of them even called to see if they could find it. I feel bad I hope she doesn't need it because that means she went without it because of some stupid pharmacy!

Heck technically it isn't even the pharmacy it's the ER doctor who wrote it. Why prescribe something that is impossible to find??? Maybe he didn't even know... As it is I already feel like an Idiot because that seriously could have waited until morning and I could have gotten her an appointment instead of sitting there all night.. Although I did call the on call and they are the ones who told me to take her in... So maybe I should stop feeling that way...

My friend Jennifer took the kids all night long and didn't even call me to tell me they were up. She sent me a text and said when she calls she calls. LOL! I slept until 9 with Abigail only waking up 2 times. It was very nice. Although I missed my booger heads... Well I need to go wake up Abigail before I explode! She's been a little sleepy today.. Probably because she was disturbed so many times last night! Poor thing!

Apparently we have a virus..

A pretty yucky one too. Abigail would seriously NOT PEE!!! From 7 last night until 11 this morning... NOTHING... Not a dribble....

At 9 I said enough is enough and took her to Children's.. James even missed school because of this.. We get there they took her straight back.. They know me and they know it takes alot for me to even go in there so they did not doubt me one bit plus she's my 4th and by now I know...

Anyway.. The doc comes in and starts checking her out and I was telling her how she had had some really bad diahrea the night before and she asked if I was sure it wasn't mixed with pee and I said yes cause she did it without a diaper on.. So the doc takes her diaper off barely starts to examine her and what does she do??? PEE"S!!!!!!!!!!!! I was so mad/happy!!! So I turned around to get a diaper come back and she's covered in poop!

Gross nasty kinda poop too. I know TMI. But the doc was like well she is peeing.. I was like ya for the first time in 18 hours she pees... That's not normal.. So she checked again to make sure it wasn't cause she stimulated her and it wasn't apparently she decided to not hold it anymore.. Along with the poo too cause she has been doing that all day! So they released her on the condition that if it continues that she come back for IV fluids cause she can get dehydrated fast... Well duh that's what I was worried about why do you think I brought her in you ding dongs!!! The doctors were weird but the nurses were great.

Well maybe that's just cause they know us.. IDK if that's a good or bad thing.... Well finally a little while ago she SOAKED a diaper.. So im a little less worried but we will see how she does tonight... At least they didn't poke her.. I seriously would have lost it... I cried when we were getting ready to leave just because I had to take her... Stupid hormones! lol! Well that's my adventure for the day!!!!!!

2 weeks old!

Abigail is 2 weeks old today! Well Monday that is...

She is a FANTASTIC baby. Now if we can just get nursing going better I will be happy... Too bad I have a clogged duct and I will tell you they HURT like heck.

Oh and for those that don't know warm tea bags work WONDERS for sore nipples. I know I know TMI. But hey who wouldn't want to know how to make their nipples stop feeling like there are a thousand needles in them????

We went for her checkup today. She weighs in at 4 pounds 10 ounces... We are switching to an every 2 hour feeding schedule whether she wants to or not. 3 hours at night. So more nursing more sore nipples and hopefully this duct unclogs in the next day or so... I have had mastitis once and that was NO fun...

Her preemie diapers are starting to get small. Yay! But she has a really bad diaper rash.. BOO! She slept the other night from 1130 until 630 and poo pooed sometime inbetween.. Poor baby! It's starting to look better. You would think being a mom of 4 I would know better than to let her sleep that long!

What can I say I was sleepy and I forgot to set an alarm! Heck she really is my alarm! Everyone else is doing great. Michelle is attempting more and more everyday to give herself a concussion by falling into things... I seriously cannot baby proof a wall. The kid falls into them at least 3 to 4 times a day... Shawn and James seem to have gotten themselves possessed with sassy kid syndrom.. Michelle has this too... too bad they don't like spending time in time out...

Abigail refuses to take a bottle so that kinda makes me happy/sad... No breaks for this momma... Well she is waking up.. Of course.. I sat down so it's time to be awake right??? lol!!!!! Hope all is well!!

I love being a mommy!

I just love that sense of being needed. James needs me, Shawn Jr. needs me, Michelle needs me, and now Abigail needs me!

It is so awesome to have all 4 of my babies here with me! Abigail is such a good baby. Eats, sleeps, poops... All in that order too! lol! She only woke me up 3 times last night to eat. Nursing is a little challenge as she isn't eating as much as im producing.. Well if you yourself have never felt engourgement.. OUCH!

Hopefully it doesn't last too much longer. I don't want to pump because I don't want to overrun my freezer like I did with Michelle. Besides it will probably be about 3 more days and my body will adjust just like it did with the others.

James and Michelle are absolutely fascinated by her. Shawn Jr. not so much. He wants her to go back to the hospital. He stayed up with me for a while last night so that he could help give her a bath and help me burp and change her.

I am tired though. It's been almost 3 years since I had a newborn to feed and change. It's just so funny that a week ago they were telling me about 3 weeks and she can go and she came home yesterday! It's so amazing. I am definetly counting my blessings!

God has given me such a wonderful task in life. I would never trade this for anything! Ill upload pics soon!

Home sweet what????

YES HOME!!!!!! OFF TO THE NICU TO GO GET ABIGAIL!!!!!!!!!! 1 week and 2 days I have been away from her... Not no more!!!!!!

Homeward bound so momma has gone crazy!!!

This mommy has litterally lost her mind!

Today:Washer got plugged. FYI if you have a front loader under the door is a panel. Pop that panel off there is a drain plug.. Pull it out and you will find buried treasure! Make sure you have a towel to clean up the water. So im a plumber now too.

Than just a bunch of other things. I have some of the greatest friends who are all trying so hard to help so I can be with Abigail! Tomorrow is my friend Heathers turn! She had her little baby Ryker not too long ago and the last time I was preggo her and I were pregnant together too! I was with girls and she was with boys! Too funny!

So tomorrow is my lactation consult. Than her car seat trial. Than her sleep study and then Wednsday when she passes her sleep study we will be HOME!!! Can you believe it??? She is a week old today!

A week ago she was having issues and now she is coming home??? It doesn't seem real! I guess it will really sink in when she is home in my arms and not some random nurse. My heart literally aches everyday when I lay her down. She is such a good nurser! I can't wait to do it without eyes watching making sure she is still eating!

She has been off all oxygen support since Thursday I want to say. Tomorrow is her last billi test and if all is well away go the lights. Her IV is out. Oh and she is allergic to Penicillin! How crazy is that??? Thats ok. I just can't wait to have her home!

So tonight I have to finish laundry, clean the living room carpets, the hallway carpets, my bathroom, and the back porch but I think the hallway and back porch can wait until the morning! Everyone else is doing great! Thank you to everyone for their calls, texts, and messages! I promise one day I will get back to everyone!

In the last year...

January- Started out realively good.. Than grandma got sick and grandma passed away. Her and I were each others shoulders for over 5 years. So for her to be gone so quickly was hard. Friends truely showed their true colors and so did family. Most were not in the best way.

February- Started out horrible. Michelle had a shunt revision this month and got RSV and her fundoplication surgery had to be rescheduled.

March- Started looking up! Michelle got her surgery and just started thriving more than ever!

April-This is a month I would love more than anything to forget! Just miserable.. Things just were not peachy at all.. There were times where I wasn't sure Shawn and I would make it. After all we had been through it just wow.... And to top it off Michelle needed to have another shunt placed to help that cyst.

May- Was a terrific month. We found out Abigail was going to be joining our family this month! What a sweet little blessing!

June- Was great until morning sickness set in...

July- Huh what do you know more morning sickness... UGH!

August- It started to go away and James started school!

September- Found out we were having a girl and that Shawn was going to be deploying!

October- SUCKED! Shawn left and well it just stunk!

November- Was great! It really picked me up and boosted me about the baby coming!

December- EVENTFUL! That is definite! Between dr.'s and sick kids and than Christmas and than 4 days of labor! It was all worth it! Abigail is an awesome baby!

Abigail is doing great! She is completely off all oxygen support and tomorrow her IV could be out. She does have jaundice but that is an easy fix. She is on billi lights to help it.

I went in and nursed her today. Oh what an awesome feeling that was. She latched right on with no problems. She was happy to have mommy too! Nice warm fresh milk I would be happy too! They are going a little slow on her feedings but whenever I am up there she can nurse!

Cloud 1000!!!!!!!!! I have been smiling all day! Only thing is Michelle is sick and is keeping me awake at night. She refuses to sleep. Just wants to scream. And with me being as tired as I am last night I turned off her monitor and just crashed. She fell asleep not to much later. I just couldn't take it. Im hoping she will get the hint tonight and sleep. Im keeping my fingers crossed thats for sure! Well I hope everyone is having as good of a new years as I am!